im·per·ma·nence (ˌ)im-ˈpərm-nən(t)s, -ˈpər-mə-\
not lasting or durable; not permanent
impermanence is an undeniable and inescapable fact of human existence.
whether you are reading the Webster dictionary or reading up on buddhism (i would like to state that i am NOT buddhist), impermanence is the nature of life. nothing in this world is fixed or permanent. everything is subject to change and alteration. life is comparable to a river, a progressive movement, a successive series of different moments joining together to give the impression of one continuous flow.
some days i go to yoga for a workout, some days i go for perspective. last night, i walked into the studio looking for a good sweat after being out of town, but instead got the latter. during the 75 minutes of class, the instructor continued to refer to impermanence and finding comfort in it. reflecting on my drive home, i realized that impermanence can bring comfort in hard times and gratitude in happy times. currently, impermanence fits in every aspect of my life:. relationships, work, health, financial status, even where i currently live.
i find comfort in knowing that my financial status will hopefully improve as time goes on - my loans will get smaller, my income will get bigger - i will become more established. i find comfort in knowing that drew and i will eventually move into a bigger place, share less space with others and take 'the' next step, celebrating with others will turn into celebrating us. i find comfort in knowing that long days of working 2 jobs will come to an end. i find comfort in knowing that while i cannot run, i have found new passions.
i find gratitude in knowing that i am more established now than i was last year. i find gratitude that i am able to manage my responsibilities. i find gratitude in the home where we currently live, what this space has meant to us and the help that we have received to make it ours. i find gratitude that we live close to (almost) everything we love. i find gratitude in drew's companionship, creating our own timelines, and following our own rules. i find gratitude that i have the opportunity to impact 3 little boys' lives so their parents can have a break. i find gratitude that i can move and control my own body.
i find gratitude that i will be able to look back 5, 10 years from now and know what i have at this moment is special, unique and essentially, carefree. where i am right now is exactly where i am meant to be.
find comfort in impermanence, find gratitude in impermanence because this moment, whether it is difficult or joyful, it will come to an end - either hang in there or cherish it.
always striving for more,