.:happy mother's day:.

as i get older, the dynamics of Mother's Day changes. not only does it get harder to make it home to celebrate with my own mom, but there are more and more Moms in my life, from other family to coworkers to my own best friends. another thing i've noticed as i get older is what it must take to be a Mom! i find myself in a habit of not having a schedule or habits! my days revolve around work, working out, hanging out with friends, cooking/baking, yoga, basically whatever i decide i want them to revolve. being a Mom, you must put a lot of these things aside or at least put a lot more effort into making time for these things. i respect that and maybe it's selfish for me to not want this (yet), but i truly do admire and am in awe at how much it takes to be a mother (although i am sure i am still underestimating it).

i was fortunate enough to see my mom and grandma on saturday at my Grandma's 90th birthday, 90! some people have asked me what her secret is and my response is, she simply forgets how old she is.....literally. we joke about it because it is hard to see such a strong influence in your life slowly lose grasp of reality and forget who you are, but she's still there, somewhere. either way, it was a very special way to spend a part of Mother's day enjoying the company of my mom, grandma and other family.


although i wasn't able to spend the actual Mother's Day with my mom or any other mommas in my life, i still felt like i was still spending the day with her because in a way, i am her (scary!).

in all seriousness, i have a lot to thank my mom for because i certainly wouldn't be who i am today without her guidance and example. i was fortunate to spend my day doing things that i know i enjoy thanks to my mom's influence; biking and gardening!

we always had a tradition growing up that my mom and i would plant her flower garden on Mother's day and i thought of that on sunday, as i was planting flowers in my own garden. it was a special moment that i got to spend by myself reflecting on those past years.

after the MF spent a couple hours with his mom and grandma, we decided to go on a looooong bike ride and enjoy the nice day (approx. 35 miles, yikes). along the way, again i felt my mom's silent presence as i enjoyed the nature, the fresh air, and simply the sport of biking. the MF and i even mentioned how it's crazy, but nice that we are finally able to enjoy the scenery without our parents around to 'encourage' us to appreciate it.

so here is a much deserved shout out to my momma:  i cannot begin to thank you enough for all that you have done for me. from being my sanity in a household of boys, to all of our BK trips (although incredibly unhealthy, i will never forget our order: whopper jr with cheese, no onion or tomatoes and fries x2), for all our shopping trips, being my running buddy and most important, believing me when i didn't believe in myself whether knee related or otherwise. i will forever have your influence apart of me including the big characteristics such as cleaning (someday), mannerisms and devilishly good looks to the silent things, enjoying nature and leading a healthy lifestyle (i'll overlook the years of BK). you will always be my momma, my support and my best friend, i love you MORE.

please enjoy these photos, a few are from our bike ride on Mother's day while a few are some with me and my mommas in my life.....you are all amazingly strong and selfless women......

always striving for more, 

dee b.

.:notice everything:.

i broke the rules.

the rules were to not run any longer and i broke them. oh well.

i went for a run last night outside. i don't remember the last time that i went for a full run outside. i want to say that it was only 4 miles and no big deal, but it was so much more than that to me.

transitioning my cardio from the freedom of  pavement and wherever scenery took me, to an clunky elliptical battling over TV rights, has been hard to say the least. i feel restricted to where, when and how long i can workout for. the saying stands, you never really know what you got until it's gone. there were days where i used to find myself saying, 'i have to go out on a run today'. looking back, it should have been phrased, 'i get to run today'.

running turned into my outlet during college. regardless of what i had going on during school, work, relationships, my living situation, it was stability i could count on. i think the hardest part about this transition is trying to find another outlet, another way to spend my time, to keep my sanity, to maintain my self-worth and identity. this may sound extreme, but identifying myself as a runner for years and than having to find another identity is going to be a journey as i have already realized this week.

this past week was trying and frustrating and i felt as if i had no outlet. any outlet that i did try, yoga, ellipticalling, gardening, made me feel just as defeated because i NEEDED to run, i WANTED to run.

anyway, i took my time enjoying this run, noticing everything :: the changing scenery, fresh air, animals (even though i only saw rabbits, squirrels and birds), smells that changed throughout the route, uneven sidewalks and crunching leaves. i realize that i can't make this a regular thing and i really need to focus on transitioning my lifestyle into less running, less impact activities to help myself and my knee. i know it's going to be a journey of trial and error, good moods and bad moods. it's a journey of uncertainty, but one thing that is certain is i will cherish every run that i GET to do.

next time you are on a run, do me a favor, do yourself a favor and notice everything.


always striving for more,
dee b.

.:eating well for cheap:.

i have always enjoyed cooking and watching Food Network. i could spend hours watching Paula Deen, Emeril Lagasse, and maybe Rachel Ray (if it's not early in the morning--too perky for me). i will admit, i am the person at the gym who has the TV turned to Food Network (but will act like i don't care if you change it while cringing inside).

let's face it, it's fun to watch them make the food, but running to print off the recipe (FYI: they can easily be located under the scheduled time of the TV show on foodnetwork.com), then to the grocery store and trying to re-enact it, with perfect hair, makeup and smile, isn't as easy as they make it look. plus, most of the recipes call for crazy ingredients or spices that have to be bought in bulk and will never be used before it goes bad. not good for the storage in the kitchen (or lack thereof) or for my budget!

while i do appreciate the time and effort these professionals take for each detail of these recipes, i am not that tedious nor do the MF or i really take note of all the spice differences which is why i take the recipes that i see online or on TV and make them simple, affordable and maybe a bit more healthy!

i can thank my father for showing me as a little girl, that you can essentially throw anything on to a skillet, combined with the right things and VOILA, a meal is served at a low cost and most likely with leftovers! while i may be a little more picky with my food than my father (read: a lot more picky), his concept makes sense whether you have odd ends that need to be used up or you went to the grocery without a list or plan (epic mistake for me).

while struggling with outgoing bills outweighing incoming paychecks, the first thing i had to cut down was my grocery bill! as all of you may know, eating healthy, clean and fresh is EXPENSIVE even without going organic! i was willing to compromise (read: forced) a little on the healthy and fresh side in order to stay within budget, so i created a few traditional inexpensive dishes with a healthy boost.

BAM! (Emeril, anyone? anyone?)

frozen chicken breast (made stovetop, not ideal) glazed with buffalo sauce with steamed veggies on the side topped with (a little) butter and Parmesan cheese. i am a HUGE fan of steamed veggies because they are essentially effortless with the help of a steamer basket and it is a great way to get rid of veggies that may be getting old soon!

this happens to be brussel sprouts and asparagus (fresh) with broccoli and cauliflower (frozen).

not pictured: petite side of ranch. sorry, i'm not sorry. :)

bring Chipotle home to you! chances are, with a little effort put in to the cooking, this homemade option is going to be healthier than the chain version. this was the MF's idea, so i give him all the credit here. in this pile of goodness, there is cilantro whole grain rice (literally, minute whole grain rice with cut up cilantro), fajita veggies, black beans, tomatoes, salsa, chicken and steak (grilled), cheese, lettuce and yes, there is sour cream!

it may not have had the 'authentic Chipotle' taste, but it tasted fresh and awesome in it's own way!

 ok, this one is a little more complicated then the rest:.

Mexican Quinoa Salad

• 1 1/2 cups cooked quinoa
• 1 1/2 cups black beans
• 1 cup corn, thawed
• 1 avocado, diced
• 1 tomato, seeded and diced
• 1/2 red onion, diced
• 1/4 cup lime juice
• 4 cloves garlic, minced
• 1/2 cup fresh cilantro, chopped
• 2 tablespoons olive oil
• 1 teaspoon honey or agave nectar
• 1 teaspoon sea salt
• 1 avocado, diced

in a large bowl, combine cooked quinoa, black beans, corn, tomato and red onion. in a blender or food processor, combine lime juice, garlic, cilantro, olive oil, honey or agave nectar and sea salt. process until mixture is smooth. toss with quinoa mixture.

this quinoa may be a little more intensive, but it tastes good served hot, cold, with chips or on it's own! you can't go wrong! tip:. make a large batch, it will last for about 5-7 days refrigerated--leave the perishable veggies out until you are ready to eat it (avocado, tomato).

i feel like this dish should have a cool name, but honestly, this picture is saved to my desktop as 'veggie pasta'. lame.

however, this pasta is far from lame! (shameful pitch)

let's face it, carbs are cheap, but throwing in some veggies can make it less carb-dense. i started buying whole grain or quinoa pasta to feel less bad about eating pasta 2 times a week to cut down on the grocery bill. for this particular meal, i steamed veggies: peppers, asparagus, zucchini, onions and mushrooms to put on top whole grain pasta with red vodka sauce. i try to stray away from white sauces and use more red sauces that are less cream based.

who doesn't love chili, for reals? this was thrown together last minute last night when the MF and i decided we felt like comfort food and here is how we did it:.
he browned the ground beef while i combined in a big pot:.
-1 big can tomato puree
-1 big can diced tomatoes
-1 big can corn
-6 red potatoes cubed
-1 can kidney beans
-carton of baby portabella mushrooms
-1/4 onion diced
-2 green peppers diced
-1 red pepper diced
-packet of Chili seasoning

we ate what happened to warm up in a 1/2 hour and put the rest in a crockpot overnight to let it finished simmering (the potatoes needed to finish cooking). you could literally change this recipe up any way that you want to and it would work well!

ok, so to be honest with you guys, i really do try hard to eat healthy most of the time, but i do have a sweet tooth!

behold, my dessert plate from a brunch on sunday.....

picture courtesy of the MF

yes, that is a chocolate dipped oreo, wafer and rice krispie and yes, there is a waffle underneath all that whipped cream....somewhere. 

is all about balance, right?

always striving for more,
dee b.

another day living life on the dee list

i have really been bothered lately that i haven't taken the time to religiously blog at least once a week....

i do find myself busy doing other things and when it comes time to sit down for the day, i don't think about blogging, but i feel like the excuse of 'being busy' has been worn dry. with that being said, i am taking the pressure off of writing lengthy posts and keeping it simple. who doesn't need more simplicity in their life?


anyway, i figured i would fill you guys in on my day because if you are reading this, hopefully you care about it! :)

the past few months have been based around trying to find a solution to my knee pain and avoid further damage, whether the solution is permanent or temporary.

step 1: temporary fix=synvisc injection, also referred to as the rooster comb injection. the purpose of this injection is to put a gel-like substance in to help 'oil' my joint to avoid bone friction and further wearing down of the joint. essentially, adding life to my knee.

being me, i spent all day on thursday leading up to my appointment, 'googling' this injection and found nothing, but horror stories about how painful to injection was to get and that followed for weeks after. this was not helpful, my Dr. came in to find me sweating and feverishly try to calculate if this is is worth it.

needless to say, i survived the injection and was given a gold star for barely flinching. even though the needle was quite long, it was fairly thin which helped it sneak under my knee cap quite easily. plus, this Dr. kind of knows his stuff, so he knew exactly where the sucker needed to go.

2 days have passed with minimal pain and stiffness, so far, i say that's a win! my Dr. is not exactly hopeful that this will last long or even fix anything at all, but hopefully at my follow-up appointment in August, i will be able to prove him wrong....

now, to put it to the test of a run....

i am very grateful for my life on the dee list, it's fun, unexpected, challenging and not similar to any other 22 year old's (but i have gained validity with my UCare seniors when they call in regarding this injection).


off to live my life, bad knee and all!

always striving for more,
dee b.

.:happiness comes when you overcome the most impossible challenges:.

have you ever heard the phrase, 'when it rains, it pours'?

i am a 'glass half-full' type of person and really like to focus on positive things in my life, but in order for us to appreciate the good things, we have to have rainy days, right???

i haven't wasted a lot of energy thinking about these events, they happened, i am changed from them, but needed to move on.....but perhaps it would be good for me to write about them.....

you know those four-legged furry friends that act as children or siblings for 10-15 years? ya, i'm talking about dogs (sorry, Henry). but seriously, dogs have a way of adapting from 'just a pet' to part of the family. well, our little (but old) Maggie, was put down a few Fridays ago. she was a miniature schnauzer that we 'adopted' many years ago, 13 to be exact. she was our childhood dog.

we have many memories with Maggie from me dressing her up as cheerleader (with scrunchies on her ears, of course), letting all 18 lbs of her take over 3/4 of our beds, taking her on W-A-L-K s (yes, we had to spell it when she was around), to catering to her sassy-ness when we did something that was not to her satisfaction. she was an awesome dog who was extremely loyal and lovable. she demanded that she greets you at the door with whines and kisses when you got home, who cares if you only went out to grab the mail?

we all spend so much time, energy and money protecting our animals and help them thrive, but over the years our forever youthful, Maggie, was even feeling the effects of age. she was having troubles getting up and down the stairs, had those awful age bumps (gross), would whine in her sleep cause she hurt and even needed a very expensive new stomach a few years back because she decided to help herself to apples that had fallen off of our trees (there goes a college payment, thanks Maggie!) on the morning of February 10th, my parents could not get Maggie to wake up and stand up on her own, her vertebrae had collapsed, it was definitely a sign that enough was enough. as anyone knows who lost a pet, last pictures were taken and tears were shed.

my mom will eventually get a new baby (she is looking into adopting), but Maggie will always be our first dog and never replaceable. she will always be a part of our family and memories.....

RIP Maggie, we are sorry if you never thought you got enough treats....

as i have mentioned before, i have bad knees. not the 'my knees get achy when it's cold outside' bad knees(which they do), but i have 'what can i do to prevent a knee replacement at 28' bad knees. i was very excited to meet with a knee specialist at TRIA Orthopaedic Center and make a plan of action to preserve the knee that i have. did you catch that i said i WAS excited? excitement was over 15 minutes into the appointment. not only had he confirmed that my knee does indeed suck (i was hoping everyone else who had already told me that was wrong), but that he wanted to do another surgery in order to make a plan of action. the purpose of this surgery was to validate whether i was a candidate (i think he said 'great candidate') for a meniscus transplant along with an osteotomy. sound fabulous and intense? cause it is. being stubborn (or in denial), i don't want to go into details about it, but let's just say it would include 4 weeks bedrest and 8-10 weeks no walking, i would handle that well, right? the news got worse. surgery or no surgery, he said that i must give up running. i couldn't even call him an idiot because this was THE knee specialist who I had waited weeks to see. my first worry was the Lululemon SeaWheeze 1/2 marathon that i have already signed up, booked airfare and hotel for. i'm already tired of talking about this appointment and my knees in general, so to wrap it up, the Lululemon 1/2 marathon will be my last running hurrah. am i upset? hell yea. am i giving up? no. i have fought Dr.'s orders and the odds against my knees for many years and it is time to be smart. i am 22 years with a bad wheel. so, after the emotions settled and i was able to step back and realize that i want to have an active lifestyle for al ong time. running or no running. i do feel very grateful that my last hurrah will be at the greatest event that i have ever signed up for.

to date, it has been 5 weeks since i have ran (ok, i ran twice for 15 minutes each time), but i introduced myself to elliptical and stair master. we all agreed this 'love' triangle could get messy and complicated, but we are all in it for the long haul.

i am in the process of learning that there are a lot of other ways to get a good workout that doesn't include running (suggestions are appreciated). plus, i am able to dive more into my yoga practice, win-win! (kinda of....)

anyway, i am still smiling and realizing with the right mindset and the right people by my side, there are a lot more things to be grateful for than to feel misforunate about.

with the glass half full,

always striving for more,

dee b.

.:a season in review:.

 i feel like i have SO much to write about that i don’t even know where to start……

let’s start with my pride and joy, my basketball team! as i write this, the season has come to an end (tear) and our end of the party last night wrapped it all up, but if i left it at that, it would not come close to the justification that this season and my girls deserve..

starting this role, i remember being told by one of my ‘bosses’ (a retired Timberwolf) that if i were able to get this group of girls to win ONE game, i would be offered a “multi-million dollar deal”. if that were true, i’d probably have his job, but i obviously am still waiting on that deal (hence, my employment still at UCare). nonetheless, my girls have surpassed even my highest expectations. i knew i had my work cut out for me when the first practice started off with teaching the girls how to dribble, where (and what) out of bounds were and how (and why) we line up for free throws, but i also believed in them from that very first practice.

i don’t want to give you a play by play of every game, but here are a few highlights…

>  winning our first game of the season (i think that may have been the first time i showed that i was ‘a little’ competitive). in this game, our smallest girl on the team got a basket and our second smallest girl hit her free throws. who said they couldn’t even get the ball to the hoop? :)

>  almost beating an ‘A’ team. yes, i said almost. we went up against a lot of A teams that put themselves in B brackets, but before this game i was told there was no way we were going to beat this team and the best thing i could do is as a coach, is to just get them through. if you think losing to this team by 3 in overtime impossible, then we accomplished the impossible. my girls deserved to win that game, but that’s not always the game of basketball

>  taking 3^rd place at a Lakeville tournament. not only was this their first ‘title’, but it was 3^rd! to see the joy on their faces when we got our 3^rd place shirts is a picture will never be a moment i take for granted……

>  beating 2 teams in the State tournament that beat us earlier in the year. by beating us, i mean destroying us by about 20 points. do you know how much 20 points is in 5^th grade? to give you a hint, we won a game 7-2….. not only did we beat them, but we came from behind and beat them! both halftimes, i remember telling the girls if they wanted to stretch out the season as long as possible we needed to win these games and we needed to believe that we can win.

the last moment was by far one of my proudest moments to date. not only was it a testimony to hard they have worked and how far they have come, but it just goes to show that these girls have heart and fight. they also have a passion for the game of basketball, to learn and grow in the game.

to be honest, i don’t even know what our record was at the end of the season because i didn’t keep track, it didn’t matter. my guess would be that we weren’t even 500, but i can guarantee not many teams accomplished the things that we did.

as i told the girls at our party, they brought me to tears out of both frustration and pride. i feel as though i adopted ten 5th graders as my daughters (or maybe sisters considering I’m only 11 years older than most of them).

growing up, i have always heard my coaches tell me that they learned more from us than what we probably did from them and i always thought that was the stupidest thing ever (weren’t you the one who made us run if we didn’t do what you told us to?). i can honestly say that i now know exactly where they were coming from. they girls have taught me how to be responsible, a leader, positive, and stern. after a long day of working in a call center, the best cure was to come to a practice and see how much these girls depended on me. the greatest thing was that no matter what bill was due the next day, whether i had enough money to put gas in my car or if i was exhausted from working, the girls energized me and taught me that life will go on, but when we all stepped on the court nothing else matter (except maybe what time everyone was going to the pool….). in all seriousness, i would like nothing more that to have the opportunity to coach these girls again.

it is with a full heart and on the verge of tears (both happy and sad), that i wrap up my first season as a head coach.

thank you to everyone who supported me and the girls. thank you to the parents who got the girls to every practice and game regardless of how many crazy activities they had going on. thank you to my assistant coach who was my side kick and confidante, who supported me in every decision and game plan. thank you to my dad for all the advice, long phone calls on the way home talking out plays, drills and obstacles. thank you to my MF who woke up early on weekends to go to games and stayed up late waiting for me with dinner ready when i didn’t get home from practice until 10:15 and thank you to ‘my girls’, let’s hope this isn’t the last time you guys bring me to tears.

.:reunited and it feels so good!:.

i know most of you loyal followers (making that plural may be a little TOO confident), have been checking my blog daily wondering where the heck i've been since my last post (i am ashamed to say that it has be well over a month).

 

anyway, i am back and it feels so good! this post symbolizes a lot more for me than having 20 minutes to fill you in on my life, but it also means that my life and schedule is drastically slowing down which i desperately need!

 

the past 4 weeks has been filled with lots of cube-sitting, basketball coaching, yoga training, no sleep (ok, i got a few hours), eating whatever and whenever i can and awesome memories! it has been a ton of fun, minus the cube-sitting, but bills have to get paid, right?.

i have been on a search for an outlet from my cubicle job (for when baskeball ends) that would also be a supplemental income. the idea of becoming a yoga instructor has always been on the back of my mind. however, i thought it was going to stay there for a verrrry long time and for many reasons. a few reasons include i couldn't afford the program, i didn't have enough time and i didn't think i was cut out to teach yoga. one afternoon as i was sitting in my cube researching the program further, it seemed as though all the stars aligned and it was meant for me to go through Yoga Sculpt teach training at CorePower Highland Park , i mean why not throw another thing on my plate, right?

in all seriousness, the training schedule hardly interferred with my basketball schedule and i was offered a scholarship to help relieve the cost of the program! i was literally sitting in my cube, doubting myself with butterflies in my stomach (of excitement/nerves) and tears in my eyes thinking about how i couldn't deny myself this opportunity.....could i?

a HUGE thanks goes out to the manager at CorePower Highland Park. her willingness to help in anyway possible, believing in me when i didn't and giving me that extra push was the ultimate deciding factor. so i joined 24 other yogis on a journey.....

along this journey, we spent over 40 hours together deepening our individual yoga practice, sweating, counting on the beat (in our 'yoga voice' of course) and lifting each other up in encouragement. outside

of our 'classroom' sessions, we spent many hours going to classes together including a group fitness class at other gyms in the metro. 2 other yogis and i experienced a zumba class at 'The Firm'  in minneapolis, what an experience! i'm convinced it was more striptease than zumba, either way, my hips, knees and arms were definitely not made to coordinate or move in any type of 'striptease' fashion. looks like i'm stuck at UCare making my money....


i thought i was going to be relieved when the training program ended and i would get (some) free time back, but i really miss it! i miss sitting in a studio learning all about Yoga Sculpt with my ohmies. i am SO grateful to both of our beautiful and talented instructors and for all of my fellow ohmies. they supported me in every mistake, triumph and made me get out of my comfort level....along with making me permanently sore for a 4 weeks straight :)

to my fellow ohmis:. you all have touched my life and my practice in SO many ways. we are such a talented and special group of individuals with a passion for yoga, sweat and elevating others. even though most of us are at the beginning stage of teaching, i am so excited to see where this journey brings all of us.


:.namaste:.